DUE: Sun. 9/20/15 @ 7:00p
Just the bare bones, please.
What do you plan to argue, and what have you got up your sleeve to back it up!
THINK:
A. intro: main claim / thesis claim + sub-claims
B. sub-claim1
- evidence
- evidence
- evidence
C. sub-claim2
- evidence
- evidence
- evidence
D. sub-claim2
- evidence
- evidence
- evidence
& repeat as necessary . . .
Z. conclusions: restate and wrap-up (+tie-in question beyond scope of your essay…)
A few guidelines and requirements for this exercise:
√ 5+ section (i.e./ intro, 3+ body sections, conclusions)
√ posted to our site (pls log in and use comments function at the bottom of this page)
AND
√ submit via Web Form Here (to ensure course credit!)
NEXT UP: 2-3d: E2 Preliminary Draft
A: Childhood was normal, parents gave siblings and I free reign mostly, no real troubles aside from petty squabbles. Was very bored as a child though, and got into gaming, which has been the primary influence on me.
B. Childhood
1.Parents
2.Siblings
3.Extended family
C.Gaming
1.Introduced to games by parents
2.Been gaming for a long time
3.Gaming has introduced me to many good friends and role models
4.Gaming is primary reason I chose degree in computer science
5.Gaming used to escape from boring reality
D.School
1.Did well early in school
2.Got bored of school because work was too easy
3.Occasional arguements with parents because of low grades
E:Childhood was normal but boring, got me into gaming, the only thing I care about in life, did far worse in school than I could have because of boredom
A. Intro: Who I am today has been mainly influenced by my family, where I grew up, and sports.
B. Family
1. My family, mainly my mother’s side, is very close
2. The street I live on, Yeates Lane, is named after my mother’s side.
3. I’ve grown up with family living on the same road as myself, my grandmas, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
4. My immediate family and family next-door are very supportive and helpful with everything.
C. Virginia Beach
1. I was born and raised in Virginia Beach, and I’m still living there as I attend Virginia Wesleyan.
2. This is where I’ve got my education, met my best friends, and had endless opportunities.
3. I’m very lucky to have grown up in this city, where we have the oceanfront, the Lynnhaven river, the Chesapeake Bay, Sand bridge, Seashore, Pungo, and Norfolk a short drive away.
D. Softball
1. Through softball, I’ve met so many people I would never have met otherwise. I’ve played for several different teams, and each team consisted of girls from different areas and states.
2. Softball has always been something I can rely on to take my mind off of everything else, it gives me an escape from reality.
3. I’ve gone through injuries a couple times and coming back from injuries and getting back to where you were is a challenge, and it’s taught me to be strong.
4. I’ve learned to play under a lot of pressure, in front of a lot of people. I’ve gained confidence through this.
5. I’ve pushed my mind and my body to do things I didn’t think I could and I’ a better person for it.
Z. Conclusion: Softball, family, and the city I grew up in have all sculpted my character and who I am today. I wouldn’t change anything about these three influences, I’m very happy with who I am now, and can’t wait to see what the future holds for me.
Intro: Thinking about my life I think of 5 main topics and they affect my life majorly in many ways. (Past, Present, Future)
A. Family
1. My family is always together and we stay together due to family functions and events.
2. Family teaches me life lessons.
3. I help people in my family in many ways.
B. Sports and Basketball
1. Basketball opens many opportunities.
2. The sport also teaches me life lessons.
3. Love for football and the transition from football to basketball.
4. Friends and family support my basketball career and I’ve met may people from it.
C. School/Education
1. Basketball was the highlight of high school and I enjoyed it so much.
2. Family and Friends make school easier and enjoyable from jokes to tutoring.
3. Achievements include many honor rolls winning scholarships and graduating with a 3.8
D. Sneakers
1. I spend a lot of money on shoes and sneakers and I enjoy sneaker culture.
2. Used to design sneakers and still do occasionally
3. Basketball gives you a chance to show off sneakers on the court and is a big part of sneaker culture.
E. Role Models
1. Show me an example of a great lifestyle.
2. Also teach me life lessons and how to learn from their mistakes.
Conclusion: There are many elements that make up my life and I wouldn’t change it for my life. Being a basketball player comes with more negatives than you think. This has fueled me my whole life with the goal of beating the stereotype of a “typical basketball player”.
A. Intro: As I was asked questions about my future and my past, I profoundly thought of how my life has been influenced and shaped by actions of my previous years and childhood.
B.College/ Previous years
1.In High School I did not pay attention and put in as much effort as I should have with my schoolwork
2.College is a huge step for me. I am the second one in my whole family to go to college
3.Education is a number one priority for me. I plan on majoring in marketing.
C. Sports throughout my life
1.I play Field Hockey for the college as well as 4 years in High school. Played Volleyball 3 years in Middle school. Which was a major switch
2.So far it has been difficult to maintain playing a sport, traveling, school work and a social life
3. I like the sport as well as having a close team to rely on. This feeling has been with any team I have played on.
D. Family and Religion
1.My family has always been my number one supporters throughout every obstacle in my life.
2.My family raised me to stay out of trouble and to always pray whenever you have doubts about something.
3.I am a Methodist and I have been raised by this religion since my childhood. God always comes first to me, before anything or anyone else.
Z.Conclusion: Out of everything that has happened to me in my life, I will always accept changes in my life that occur because I believe that they are for the better. I want my name to have a meaning behind it to people as my future is shaped by my own actions and beliefs.
A. Intro: I wouldn’t call my childhood normal but I would’t call it extraordinary either. I grew up with two loving parents and an amazing older brother. My parents always made sure that I was taken care of and did their best to get me involved in everything they could. I went through some difficult times, especially when my parents got divorced; but my family was always there for me. These struggles helped to shape me into who I am today.
B. Growing up
1.childhood
2.parents
3.School
C. Obstacles in life
1. High school
2. Parent’s divorce
3. Life
D.How I became who I am
1. Overcoming challenges in life
2.family
3. My values
Z. Conclusion: The struggles that I faced made me stronger than I was before. They pushed me to become who I was meant to be and taught me to find joy in every tribulation that I face.
A. Disaster Family Vacation
B. Trip there
1. Changing Vehicles
2. Broken Axle and Stairs in little rock
C. Deep Sea Fishing
1. Receiving Ginger
2. Throwing up whole time
D. Heading to Schliterbon
1. Broken Windshield
2. Bull almost hits us
E. At Schliterbon
1. Lost $500
2. Good points of Schliterbon
Z. Made a lasting impression, can’t have good without the bad, great story to tell, something to look back on and laugh at
Introduction: Most people would be offended by the senior superlative I had won, but I viewed it in a positive manner. I had been voted by my graduating class as, “most likely to stay in Catonsville.” But Catonsville is way more than a town to me, it is who I am.
B. One major way that Catonsville has impacted me is through my education.
1. Changing schools and beginning at Hillcrest
2. Middle school service learning hours
3. High school, where I found myself
4. My internship at Hillcrest Elementary.
C. Rollingwood pool, where I spent all of my summers for the past seven years.
1. Swim team was everyday
2. All of my friends hung out there everyday
3. It was my first and only job. It has taught me so much and I love it.
D. Cheerleading has been a part of my life for 12 years now, and all of those years cheering were done in Catonsville.
1. All of my Saturdays were spent at the turf at Catonsville High.
2. I cheered all throughout high school.
3. I started coaching cheerleading, and coached for 4 years.
E. It is where all of my favorite memories are.
1. Traditions with my family.
2. The fourth of July is my favorite holiday, and its know as “Christmas in Catonsville.”
3. Catonsville is where all of my best friends live, and we would do so many fun things that I will never forget.
F. Catonsville has molded me to the person I am today. It means so much more to me than the place I grew up, it is a part of me and it’s a characteristic. I am forever changed by Catonsville, it has made me the young woman I am today.
Typically when I look at myself in a mental way I normally throw myself into the section of being highly cynical as I am reminded constantly. And looking back the the activity I figured what better way to think about and be able to fully come to a personal understanding of why I am so cynical through two major factors that affect me everyday, family, religion and the news.
Media
the truth?
propaganda
quality
Religion
Cancer
Schools
News
Moms Side
loving
clouded by ulterior motives
not very open
Dads Side
open about most things (usually not good things)
separate/ no communication
unusual in every definition of the word
Due to a numerous amount of things, but mostly religion, family and media, I have come to fully understand what I really am like, and the large reasons why I am just so cynical over modern society.
Introduction:
A. One of the interview questions that I was asked in my First Year Experience class really made me have to ponder. “What are you most proudest of?” That is a difficult questions, well for me at least. Now I am not one to give myself a lot of credit but this question really made me think about all of my accomplishments that I have had over the years and how I got to where I am today, Virginia Wesleyan College. It also allowed me to think about my future. My life goes from my experiences as a child, blessings that I have had in High School, and My future ambitions and College.
1. My interests as a child
a. Volleyball
i. How I started out as a manager and ended up as the captain of my middle school team.
b. Orchestra
i. Sparked as huge interest in intermediate school
c. Meteorology
i. Watched the weather channel more than Disney Channel; Always interested in the weather, such as how clouds form and tornadoes
2. Blessings in High School
a. Senior Year
i. Choosing colleges; How Virginia Wesleyan reached out to you academically and athletics
b. Academics
i. Through all of the extracurricular activities you still maintained a 4.0 GPA; received scholarships that were a huge blessing to you and your family
c. Volleyball
i. South East Region Volleyball Club; Being recruited by Virginia Wesleyan Volleyball Coach
3. College and My Future
a. Volleyball
i. help young children learn how to play volleyball and improve their skills like your coaches have done over the years
b. Career Goal
i. Meteorologist; travel around the world
3. Virginia Wesleyan
Conclusion:
A. After thinking about it, I have have a plethora of things to be proud about. God has blessed me in so many ways with different talents and opportunities. All of my hardwork and dedication has allowed me to attend a great college and do all of things that have loved to do since I was a little kid.
A.)Intro: I did not have the most perfect life or the best childhood. My parents weren’t the best parents in the world and were in and out of my life most of the time. My grandparents are the most important people in my life and my inspiration. They are the people who already raised their three kids but took it upon themselves to raise another child, me.
B.)Childhood
1. Parents splitting up when I was three
2. Problems with mom and grandparents
3. Grandparents getting custody of me
C.)Struggles being raised by grandparents
1. Being two different generations
2. Overprotective
3. No freedom
D.) Good things being raised by grandparents
1. I always felt safe
2. I could always tell my grandparents anything that was on my mind
3. they always made sure I knew they loved me
Z.) Conclusion: Though they are just my grandparents, I consider them as my mom and dad because they took me under their wing and raised me as their own. Because they are my grandparents, we don’t always necessarily see eye to eye because we are two different sets of generations but I can honestly say that if they did not raise me and make me the person I am today, I would not be alive.
A intro: My name goes by Nicholas Deane Williams. I was born on July 2 1996 in Jacksonville Florida. I was mainstreamed into my kindergarten, 1st, 8th, and my full high school years, because I have a different way of thinking I had to spend the rest of those years in specialized classrooms. After my years in the public school system, I have developed many skills and talents when I left High School into the real world. I have an amazing personality that helped shape me into who I am today. The biggest people who were the first to help shape me, into who I am today is my family, which consists of my 2 triplet brothers Colin, and Ryan Williams, my mother Nancy Williams, and my Clifton Williams, they all helped shape me into who I am. I am proud of who I am and I believe that I am more than what anyone labels me as, I am Nicholas Williams a nice and caring person and someone who has a life and goals to fulfill, so that I may finish all my goals in life and find fulfillment in my life, and it is because I always work my hardest, and never give up until they are completed.
B. Education
1. had a hard time getting what i can do in school because of the school systems( hard time)
2. I have established my skills and talents ( self understanding)
3. Made a lot of nice friends and had a well established circle of friends as well as a huge social web( happiness)
C. Family
1. Mom helped shape me into a nice and caring individual to everyone I know
2. My Dad made me become stronger both mentally and physically
3. My two other brothers helped break my social shell and supported me in anyway they can as well as care for me
D. My self
1. I am a nice and caring individual
2. I work hard at what i do no matter what and I am always open to improvement by others
3. I can establish my own important goals in life, both long term and short term
E. Conclusion: I am myself and I have established all my confidence from my friends and family, I will always work hard to improve myself to complete all my goals in life, and no matter how hard it is to get too I will never give up on my goals until they are complete, just as in the Odyssey where Odysseus never gave up his journey home no matter how long it took, and I will complete my self established road until I complete all my goals and fulfill my life until my end.
A .My life feels consumed by loss but I’m sick of telling that same, old story. I want to write about how I moved on, and the people and things that helped me. It was mostly video games and the people I met through being a fan of them.
B. The loss of my father impacted me indescribably
1. He was my best friend
2. We spent a lot of time together
3. Had similar interests
C. That loss made my mental illnesses worse
1. Crippling depression
2. Terrible anxiety
3. PTSD
4. Couldn’t go to school
D. I tried to find something to fill the time and forget my loneliness
1. The things I used to do with my father didn’t feel “right” anymore
2. I couldn’t even be in the rooms he used to be in
E. Video games again
1. Always played them casually, picked it up from my brothers
2. Older video games were cheap
3. Very time consuming if you let it be
E. Escapism
1. Always loved fantasy
2. Got lost in worlds, characters, stories
3. Felt like I could escape my own story, even for a little while
4. Helped me ignore my own pain
F. Friends and community
1. Started interacting with other fans online
2. Led to discussions beyond video games
3. Genuine friendships were formed
i. Emotional support
ii. Real life influences
1. Why I went to VWC
4. Didn’t feel as alone
G .Overall, while I felt deep despair and loneliness, video games helped me escape some of my pain and meet new friends that I have to this day.
A. Intro: My story is boring but understandable. I was born and raised in Chesapeake for twelve years, then moved to Northern Virginia and lived with my father and other mother until my high school graduation. I suffered from parental abuse up to the age of twelve by my stepfather, depression, and obesity. I had thoughts and attempts of suicide when I was younger but got through them as the years passed by. With this experience I learned to love life and everyone in it even my enemies, I had also gained a huge amount of hope in my life and believed that everything in life does get better if you’re willing to fight and continue to fight, which is why I’ve taken the term that “All Will Be Well” quite literally.
B. Parental Abuse
1. Getting abused and neglected by my stepfather lead to depression- struggle
2. But I continued to live and try to make everything in life better- benefit
3. Although during so I binge ate and gotten fat and thought of suicide many times- struggle
C. Living with my father till graduation and going to college
1.Gained hope became a better person and adopted the saying “All Will Be Well” as motivation to make life better.
2.Made new friends and close bonds that helped me have a better time in my new home and school.
3.Graduated high school with a 3.2, got accepted to Wesleyan and have made new friends already and is ready to start a better life.
D. Life plans
1.Graduate college with a master in social work.
2.Join the Peace Corp for two year.
3.After the Peace Corp start my own social work business/orphanages.
4.Try to become a voice actor and make the world a little better.
E. Conclusion
All the trials I have went through had made me a better person who’s ready to take on the world and be ready to help change it for the better, just like my parents have always told me I would be able to.
Introduction: My life is one of preparation and refinement; always trying to make myself a better person and individual. Life is hard and will be challenging at times, so it is important to have people there to help at the worst moments. I have always been picked up in life by sports, family, friends, the workplace, and a vision of what the future looks like.
Sports
1.baseball as from the age of 3 to 14
2. football from 10-18
3. golf occasionally now
C.Family
1. oldest brother
2. sister and other brother
3. Mom and Dad
D.Friends
1. other athletes in high school
2. still Raymond and Jarrett
3. goal oriented people
E. the workplace
1. Sonic
2. The Black Pelican
3. interactions with people
F.Vision of the future
1. possibly practicing law
2. role model for kids
3. being completely in control of my own life
Z. I have found that living life to the fullest and taking advantage of all the opportunities around us is important to growth as an individual and in allowing one to play their systematic role in society. Sports, family, friends, the workplace, and vision of the future allow me to focus on doing my part in my every day betterment and leave me looking forward to every day. Do others view ideals and values as important to our development as individuals?
A. My life has been the very inspiration for me wishing to become a teacher. With the knowledge of my label of “gifted” at a young age, I felt the pressure of the world on my shoulders to live up to those expectations. Due to this, I was able to push myself farther than I thought possible. I soon realized at a young age, that you must be able to rely on yourself in life, and not on others. It is because of all of this that I have been a part of so many conferences further harness my leadership traits.
B. Being Labeled “Gifted”
-Being placed in small groups (isolated from regulated classes)
-Having High Expectations placed on me
-Being Bullied
C. Being reliable on myself
-My parents divorced
-being an only child
-creating personal goals
D. Accomplishments
-Attending multiple conferences for leadership
-Attending Barack Obama’s first inauguration
-Achieving my goal of a 4.0 gpa
Conclusion: By being able to go through so much in my life, it has shaped me into a strong, intelligent, and reliable girl. I plan to use all that I have learned and endured to become a middle school teacher. I want to help the students who are also “gifted”. I think I will succeed since I can better relate to their lifestyles than a regular teacher would.
A. Having inchoate lungs and a plethora of wires running throughout my diminutive body was not how I imagined spending the first few months of my life on earth. The doctors told my mother, who had spent eight hours in labor and only five months carrying me that I would most likely die within the number of days… but God had other plans.
B. Born January 3, 1997 in Silver Spring Maryland. Explanation of the meaning of my name.
1. Growing up premature and having severe asthma and health issues.
2. Briefly speak about my childhood and struggles throughout elementary and middle school.
3. Moving away from my first home and having to adjust to the new area. Going into detail about my family, culture, and religion and how that helped me with the adjustment.
C. Freshman year of High School (Growth and Development)
1. Meeting SGT D, journey through ROTC, making friends and meeting new people.
2. Excelling in academics, becoming the president of the national honor society, joining the drill team, engaging in community service, becoming a peer mediator, and manager of the boys’ varsity basketball team etc.
3. Highlight a few of my milestones throughout high school, making a speech at graduation and winning first place at two academic challenge competitions out of the state of Maryland.
D. Beginning college
1. The struggle to adjust.
2. Making new experiences and memories.
3. Finding out what I’m actually capable of and who I really am.
E. Conclusion: Although a few challenges have been thrown my way God provided me with a life, that my mother didn’t think was possible. She named me Iyana because “God Is Gracious” meaning, after every storm, the sun always shines.
A.Intro: My story is kind of complicated, I’ve been through things people would never think ive been through. I was born and raised on the Eastern Shore of Virginia, I played volleyball all four years of high school, I was adopted at the age of eight, I have four older siblings, and I have a new and better life.
B.Born and raised on the Eastern Shore
a.My birthday July 31, 1997
b.Grew up like any normal kid
c.Had a new family by the age of eight
C.Volleyball is my life
a.I played for four years, all through high school
b.Varsity for three years, and was the setter
c.My goal is to play sophomore year of College
D.I am Adopted
a.It was the hardest part of my life
b.I went into foster care at the age of six
c.My brother was adopted with me
E.I have four older siblings
a.One brother and his name is Daryl he is currently serving for our country in the army
b.Three sisters Kathy, Karen, and Kris. Kathy and Karen are twins.
c.I have five nieces and one nephew, all of them are older except for two of them. I have two great nieces and nephews.
F.My new life
a.I went through school successfully and graduated with honors
b.I am a current college student at Virginia Wesleyan College
c.I am very appreciative of my parents now.
G.Conclusion: Out of all the things I have been through in my life, I am extremely grateful for where I am at now. Going through adoption wasn’t easy but some kids have been through worse. I want to tell my story and inspire those who have and have not been through what I have.
A. Intro: Growing up, like any typical kid, I went through a lot. Although I wasn’t living in poverty or dying of starvation, I still had obstacles that I encountered throughout life. Divorce and family loss were the two main struggles I had to deal with but in the end, I have learned a great life lesson that I stand by which is “everything happens for a reason.” If it wasn’t for these struggles, I may not be where I am at today, attending Virginia Wesleyan College.
B. Divorce
1. Traveling to two separate states every other weekend – struggle
2. Gaining more family members – benefit
3. Growing older, trying to make time for my dad as much as my mom since he is in another state – struggle
C. Family loss
1. Lost my best friend/aunt due to cancer
2. Gained a guardian angel and she will forever be my role model
3. Her death has taught me a lot of great life lessons to live by
D. How these obstacles lead me to where I’m at today
1. Attending Virginia Wesleyan College
2. Becoming a better person all around
3. Seeing life in a different perspective
E. Conclusion: After going through all of these struggles in life, I’ve learned many life lessons on top of now being able to see why these things happen the way they did and why they did. Most importantly, I’ve learned to become more grateful for what I have in life as oppose to the things I don’t have or can’t obtain.